Day 124 – Mondayween

Day 124 – Mondayween

I am finding it harder and harder to make myself journal about the comings and goings of my corporate housing days. Is it because I have started writing for an audience rather than for just myself? Do I think myself too boring when writing about pool visitations and my relationships with clients and with Melissa? Why am I not using this as a spiritual discipline? Why am I being so hard on myself? Maybe this is just a speed bump but if it is more than that I don’t know if I can continue writing. This just hit me this morning as I pulled on my swim trunks and went out to dive into the still filled pool. And it’s sad because it is not just the writing or not writing – it’s the life being lived day in and day out that provides the foundation for the words that is troubling. Am I hitting a bit of a seasonal depression? Am I just being tough on my life and beating myself to death for not being more exciting? I think I am mainly whining about nothing because to whine is one of my favorite hobbies.

Beyond those difficult thoughts and questions I did have a lot of fun with Melissa at the hospital Halloween party. This party wasn’t actually at the hospital – it was held at one of Melissa’s friends house, which was well decorated. Right when we walked in there were ghosts and ghouls – bowls full of spaghetti and grapes behind paper walls that we had to stick our hands into (representing brains and eyeballs – scary stuff for a kid). It brought back a lot of old childhood memories. Everyone was costumed – I was Jessie Pinkman and my girl decided to go as his partner, Walter White instead of being the blue meth. She went all out and made me nervous every time I saw her fake moustache. Would I still love her if she caught some disease that forced her to have a moustache? I don’t think I could bear it – I am a shallow man at my depths. Anyway, we danced a lot and listened to traditional ghost stories – like the one with the guy who shines bright lights into the back window of a frightened girl who was driving home and the one where a guy with a claw hand does something or another. Dry ice filled the air with the classic smoky feel as tombstones covered the walls. At the end of the night, I returned my Walter White to her doorstep and kissed her hairy lip. It wasn’t as bad as I thought it would be. I guess I would keep Melissa if she had a moustache – as long as it wasn’t like a Magnum PI version.

Oh I forgot to mention that my workday was good – I really impressed those workers who are doing all of that landscaping in Lubbock. Their analytics are proving that they on the right path and they admitted to seeing good growth in their business. I also heard good reports about the Midland Corporate Housing clients. I wasn’t sure they would ever catch up with Lubbock’s high rankings, but it seems that they are nipping at their heels finally. Their point person told me that they were really glad that they had hired me. This of course made me feel very good.

Okay – that’s Mondayween. A good one to be sure. Now if I can just shake this seasonal downturn…May God restore me to a desire to write about life.